I know what it feels like to love your kids and still feel like you’re losing yourself.
I’m Deana and I’ve been exactly where you are. I I found a way through feeling less than joyful about being a mom — not by managing the symptoms of an overwhelmed life, but by rebuilding my strength and resilience from the inside out.
I wasn’t always the mom I wanted to be.
For years I lived in the gap between the mother I wanted to be and the one who showed up every day. I understood the theory of health — I was already deep in holistic health training. But I had completely missed what was happening inside my own body and my own home.
What follows is the real story — not the polished version. I share it because I think you’ll recognize parts of it, and I don’t want you to feel as alone in it as I did.
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My body reacted like it was under attack.
There was a time when normal kid behavior felt completely intolerable to me. I loved my kids deeply — but I didn’t like the way I was reacting to them. I’d snap over little things like fighting over toys and the constant mess everywhere. I felt overstimulated by the constant chatter, the unending questions and demands. Constantly hearing “Mom, watch this, Mom, play with me,” all day long, took its toll on me.
It wasn’t bad behavior. It was kids being kids. But my body reacted like I was under attack. Everything in me felt tight. My nerves were shot. Some days I just felt depressed.
Somewhere in the middle of all the laundry, meals, and constant “Mom, watch this,” I caught myself thinking something I hated admitting — I gave up my life for this. The thought would slip in before I could stop it, and the guilt followed right behind it.
My husband wasn’t the villain in this story. He worked hard and provided for our family, and I’m grateful for that because it gave me the freedom to stay home with my kids. But he didn’t carry the emotional weight I felt every hour of the day. And somewhere along the way, I stopped recognizing myself.
And underneath all of it — something I wouldn’t understand until much later — was a quiet resentment I hadn’t even named yet.
As a child I wanted to become a doctor. Later, that dream shifted to dentistry. But when I became a mom, those dreams quietly disappeared. The logistics and the course load was not something I could manage with young kids. I told myself I was fine with it. But part of me felt buried. And then the shame would hit: Good moms don’t think this way.
The wake-up call
Then my lab work came back.
Pre-diabetes. High cholesterol. Overweight. Non- alcoholic fatty liver. I was stunned. In my mind, those were the kinds of health problems that showed up much later in life. What humbled me most was this: I was already studying nutrition and wellness and beginning my transition into holistic health coaching. I understood the theory. But I had missed what was happening inside my own body. The years of unending stress I felt as a mom took its toll on my body.
My doctor recommended medication and a diabetic diet. No one asked about stress. No one asked what my daily life actually looked like. Just medication and a diet plan.
I had a choice. Medicate and manage the numbers — or I could figure out what was actually happening in my body.
The turning point
Meditation became a huge part of that shift.
So I put my holistic health training to work for me. Instead of just managing symptoms, I started rebuilding my health from the inside out — improving my nutrition, regulating my nervous system, strengthening my body, and addressing the stress I had been living under for years. Whole foods. Strength training. Less alcohol. Cleaner products. Consistent spiritual practices. Better sleep.
But meditation was where something deeper changed. For the first time in years, my mind began to get quiet. That mental clarity gave me the capacity to keep going — to keep making the changes my body needed. It became the foundation everything else was built on.
As my nervous system began to regulate, everything started to change — not just inside me, but inside my home.
Yes, my labs improved. Yes, my energy came back and I lost weight. But the real shift happened in the small, everyday moments. One evening my kids were laughing in the other room and I wasn’t bracing myself for the my next nervous system meltdown. I was calm and centered. And one day it hit me — things were actually different.
The energy of our home had changed.
My kids were more cooperative. They seemed less bratty and demanding. The house was more peaceful. Not because I forced my kids to behave differently — because I had changed. And they reflected it back to me.
The version of me that actually enjoyed motherhood wasn’t gone. She had just been buried under years of depletion I had never been taught to address.
The realization
My calling never actually left. It just changed shape.
Looking back now, it makes sense. I wasn’t a bad mom. I was operating in survival mode. My body had been living under constant stress for years, and eventually it started showing up everywhere — in my energy, my physical health, my patience, and the way I reacted to the people I loved most. And no amount of discipline or mindset work alone was going to change that.
For a long time, I carried the belief that I had given up the calling I once imagined — becoming a doctor. That belief stayed with me for years, quietly turning into resentment. I was so consumed in my own inner pain that I wasn’t even aware that resentment was a driving force behind why I was so reactive as a mom.
By taking the time I needed for self-care and personal growth, eventually something became very clear to me. Helping moms understand the root causes of their physical, mental, and emotional overwhelm — and guiding them back to a calmer, healthier way of living — is the work I was meant to do. For more than 20 years I’ve worked in holistic health, supporting hundreds of clients, leading workshops and retreats. I just had to live it first to truly know it.
Is this you?
You might be ready for this work if…
You’re reactive and you hate it
You love your kids but dread the day
You’re exhausted in a way sleep doesn’t fix
Your body is sending you signals you keep ignoring
You feel invisible in your own life
You’re ready to do real work-not another quick fix
Ready to take the first step?
Let’s find out if we’re a good fit.
I read every application personally.
This isn’t a sales call — it’s a real conversation to make sure the work we’d do together is the right work for where you are right now.
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Fill out the short application — about 10 minutes
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I read it personally and reach out within a few days
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We have a real conversation — no pressure, no pitch
Apply to Work With MeI take on a limited number of clients to make sure every woman gets my full attention.